OK, so if you know me at all, you know I don't really care for anything "written" on any part of your body. My kids will tell you, that they used to come home with "notes" written on their hands and I would make them wash it off immediately. This would include (but not limited to) "TATTOOS". I just don't understand why anyone would ever purposely walk into a place where they stick needles in you and put a foreign substance under your skin. You may know that my dad has some tats from WAY back in his Navy days. They always made for good discussion, but I still thought it was a disgrace. So, now my daughter is about to marry a man that guess what.....HAS A TATTOO. God has such a sense of humor.
Now don't misunderstand me. I don't think it is sin or you go to hell or anything like that, I just believe the "ACT" of marking the biggest organ of your body is just plain dumb. I realize a whole a lot of smart people have tattoos and this is OK. But, I did start thinking about why people have them and how this ties into the whole "I DO" thing.
Tattoos are a way that people "self express". Folks get all sorts of things made into tattoos. Pets names, famous people's names, mother - in - law, favorite actor. I think if I was forced to get one I might have my credit score tattooed on my elbow. This way I could just roll up my sleeve when I applied for credit. 'Just a minute, I'll show you my Equifax"
So when you get married, what happens to "self expression"?
I mean does my wife really want to see the number 684 on my elbow every night?
The point here is not at all about tattoos. It's about the two becoming as one! Yes, there are two very different people. And each one brings unique traits that together God uses in wonderful ways. But what about the individual? Should couplesa husband or wife be allowed to "express" themseleves even if the other one does not agree? I have my answer, but I want to know what you "think about it".
Father of the Bride
married to the most beautiful Mother of the Bride
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Facebook is a great way to discuss issues or self express yourself when it's a subject that your spouse doesn't agree on... or better known now as crackbook. (thanks bro mike) lol. but for real.... of course! you know we "self express" around here all the time.
ReplyDeleteand for the record, it is a very tasteful tatoo of paramedic/firefighter stuff (without the flames) and will be well hidden under a tux! lol and just be thankful the bride hasn't come home with "Gordo" tatooed on her anywhere---that we know of :)
ps. two words for you: Spell Check
love,
the MOB
Yes, he or she should be allowed to express himself/herself even if the other doesn't agree. Although two individuals come together as one, they do it spiritually, not actually physically share one body. If the individuals within the couple truly respect one another, then the self-expression SHOULD be done in consideration of each other. The thing to remember, though, is that you can't decide another person's actions for him/her. So, what happens...happens. I am certain that my husband's self-expression embarrass me and that I don't always agree with him (mostly verbal stuff). I am also certain that it goes both ways! :) Hope this helps!
ReplyDeleteIn my marriage, and I'm sure lots of others, we view each other as "team mates". We are in this game of life together, as equals, and although we hope that our game plan is the same, we don't always have the same techniques and skills to accomplish each task. Communication is the key.
ReplyDeleteBrad and I disagree about a lot. Sometimes, it is the small stuff: what to watch on t.v. and where to go eat dinner. But often, it's the bigger stuff: how we feel about political issues, how we should communicate our emotions, and the ultimate self-expression... what he should wear to church.
With that being said, although I would like to control what he wears to church, and I'm sure he would like to tell me how I should feel about non-traditional sexual orientations in the military-- we HAVE to respect each other's self expression, and as long as it doesn't effect our relationship, our children, or the holy union of marriage ordained by God, we've gotta tolerate!
I'm not sure if that all made sense, but I've been thinking about this subject a lot lately. I guess that's just another one of those struggles that inevitably comes out of the first few years of marriage.
Enjoyed reading your blog!
Ya know, it's funny you would bring this up. Josh and I have been talking today about how even though we are married we do have activities that we do separately and that it's ok. Just because a couple gets married does not mean that they should lose who they are as an individual (though I think it does happen often). I understand that Josh loves video / computer games and guns. He understands that I love mushy movies / musicals and books. And there's nothing wrong with the fact that I don't like video / computer games and he doesn't like musicals. It's just how we are wired. As long as there is an understanding about those things then it shouldn't be a big deal.
ReplyDeleteNow, Josh and I do differ in "things that really matter" too, like finances. I am cheap. And he knows it too. And I know he likes to spend $ on things he wants. But there's a balance. I keep him from getting spending-happy and he keeps me from being so cheap that we actually have some fun.
In short, it's all about balance and understanding. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!